Im always confused with what I want and what I need. Sometimes things seem so close but yet so far. I often question my own mistakes, my own stories and everything in between. Trying to convince myself that things happened for a reason. I learned alot from the past few years; from understanding myself and who I really am. After all, it is way better to swallow the most bitter medicine now when Im still young cause then I have my own room to improve as I get older. The one thing I discovered is that it is important to say what you want now before it is all gone. At a point I feel so much pain but often wonder if it is all heal right now, Im still in doubt with it even as Im writing this.
I do realize that changes and adjustments in my life takes alot of courage from my deepest soul. At one moment, I thought I had everything I ever wanted in my hand but in a blink of an eye, I lost evrything. I understand that life has its own ways planned for each one of us. It seems unfair at times but I know it doesn't always go my way, but I believe that when something is taken away from me, then there will be a replacement waiting for me at the end. In what form, I will never know. Because if I do, then what's the fun of living this life. It is more interesting to eat a hard candy with a suprise center and not knowing how it will taste like untill at the very end...So for now, I would let the time decide while I go on with whatever I have.